| 0 | The Strange Similarities Between George W. Bush and Dr. Seuss | cover | 1 | pencils: Mort Drucker; inks: Mort Drucker | George H. W. Bush |
| 1 | Departments | table of contents | 1 | pencils: various; inks: various; colors: various; letters: typeset | |
| 2 | - | letters page | 3 | pencils: various; inks: various; colors: various; letters: typeset | |
| 3 | The Fundalini Pages | comic story | 3 | script: Duck Edwing, Dick DeBartolo, Jeff Kruse, Matthew A. Cohen, Mike Snider, Patrick Merrell; pencils: Duck Edwing, Dennis Wunderlin, Jack Syracuse, Gary Hallgren, Garth Gerhart; inks: Duck Edwing, Dennis Wunderlin, Jack Syracuse, Gary Hallgren, Garth Gerhart; colors: Garth Gerhart | |
| 4 | How George W. Bush 'Stacks Up' Against the Other 42 U.S. Presidents | photo story | 2 | script: Desmond Devlin; pencils: AP/Wide World; inks: AP/Wide World; colors: AP/Wide World | |
| 5 | This Year's Hottest Halloween Costumes | photo story | 1 | script: Scott Bricher; pencils: Scott Bricher; inks: Scott Bricher; colors: Scott Bricher | |
| 6 | Monroe and... Global Warming | comic story | 4 | script: Anthony Barbieri; pencils: Bill Wray; inks: Bill Wray; letters: Bill Wray | |
| 7 | One Morning on Fifth Avenue | comic story | 1 | script: Duck Edwing; pencils: Paul Coker; inks: Paul Coker | Donald Trump |
| 8 | John, Frank and Carmine's Biggest Complaints about Growing Up Gotti | comic story | 2 | pencils: Hermann Mejía; inks: Hermann Mejía | |
| 9 | Duke Bissell's Tales of Undisputed Interest | comic story | 1 | script: P. C. Vey; pencils: P. C. Vey; inks: P. C. Vey; letters: P. C. Vey | |
| 10 | A Mad Look at Politicians | comic story | 4 | script: Sergio Aragonés; pencils: Sergio Aragonés; inks: Sergio Aragonés | |
| 11 | Alfred E. Neuman for President | illustration | 2 | pencils: Mark Fredrickson; inks: Mark Fredrickson; colors: Mark Fredrickson | Alfred E. Neuman |
| 12 | A Mad Poke in the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy | photo story | 3 | script: Mike Snider; pencils: Mike Snider; inks: Mike Snider; colors: Mike Snider | |
| 13 | Martha Stewart's Escape Plan | comic story | 2 | script: Matthew A. Cohen, Jason Schneider; pencils: Charles Akins; inks: Charles Akins | |
| 14 | The Strange Similarities Between the Bush Administration and the World of Dr. Seuss | comic story | 5 | script: Desmond Devlin; pencils: Mort Drucker; inks: Mort Drucker | |
| 15 | Indisputable Tip-Offs You Weren't Cut Out for a Life of Crime | comic story | 2 | script: John Caldwell; pencils: John Caldwell; inks: John Caldwell | |
| 16 | Unabridged Corporate Slogans | comic story | 1 | script: Jacob Lambert; pencils: Tom Nick Cocotos; inks: Tom Nick Cocotos; colors: Tom Nick Cocotos; letters: Tom Nick Cocotos | Alfred E. Neuman |
| 17 | Spy vs Spy | comic story | 2 | script: Peter Kuper; pencils: Peter Kuper; inks: Peter Kuper; colors: Peter Kuper | The Black Spy, The White Spy |
| 18 | The Verdict | comic story | 1 | script: Michael Gallagher; pencils: Sergio Aragonés; inks: Sergio Aragonés | |
| 19 | What to Expect at Your Team's Spanking New $450 Million Ballpark | comic story | 2 | script: Jacob Lambert; pencils: Getty Images, Al Jaffee; inks: Getty Images, Al Jaffee; colors: Getty Images | |
| 20 | The Burning Mad Show | comic story | 5 | script: David Shayne; pencils: Tom Richmond; inks: Tom Richmond | Bernie Mac [as Burning]; Bill Cosby [as Cliff Huxtable] (cameo); Redd Foxx [as Fred Sanford] (cameo); Damon Wayans [as Mike Kyle] (cameo); Kellita Smith [as Wandabra]; Jeremy Suarez [as Jawin]; Camille Winbush [as Vamessa]; Dee Dee Davis [as Breeyawna]; Ray Romano (cameo); Whitney Houston (cameo) |
| 21 | What Obnoxious Bore Is Notorious for Asking Questions No One Else Does? | cartoon | 1 | script: Al Jaffee; pencils: Al Jaffee; inks: Al Jaffee; colors: Al Jaffee | |